No Such Thing as a Free Ride

I promise this will be my last auto-centric column for a while.

But in my meager defense this vignette actually has an accounting angle – sort of.

Over the weekend my health club displayed a gleaming new McLaren automobile – of course cordoned off from touchy feely onlookers with thick velvet ropes and patrolled by a security guard who looked like someone straight out of the Blackwater recruiting catalogue.

Apparently, the local dealership was giving gym members a chance to win the car via $250 raffle tickets. Should you hit the proverbial jackpot a $300,000 McLaren Spider Coupe was all yours.

One member whom I shall refer to as Ralphie, decided to take a chance. Now Ralphie does not have the financial means of a hedge fund manager or a plastic surgeon – in fact Ralphie is one of the school bus drivers in my district. So, $250 would more than likely take a sizeable bite out of his weekly budget.

I tried mightily to talk him out of it. Thus, the conversation went something like this:

“Ralphie, let’s just for argument’s sake say the gods and fortune smile upon you and by some miracle you win this car.”

“Yeah wouldn’t that be great?”

“Well first as the owner you would have to pay the sales tax. In our area it’s 8.75 percent. That’s nearly $27,000 right out of the gate.”

“Really?”

“Then the car is treated like gambling winnings or hitting the lottery. You would have to pay the tax on that as well.”

“I didn’t know that.”

“Then you need to insure it. Trust me you can’t take out a policy on a McLaren at Geico. Try something like Lloyd’s of London and that will likely run you at least $1,000 a month.”

“Wow!”

“Then there’s the service. You would not pull into Valvoline or Mavis Discount Tire and get an oil change. You need an ultra-synthetic grade that will likely run you at least $500 per. Then there’s the gas – trust me this engine does not take regular and not every station sells fuel with the necessary octane content.”

“I never thought of that.”

In the end, Ralphie came to his senses and passed on this luxury lottery. He did however run to the local market and buy $20 worth of Powerball tickets.

He told me if he hit all 6 numbers he could buy the car anyway.

That much I couldn’t argue.