After Pomp and Circumstance, What’s Next?

Years ago, I went to a local comedy show where one of the performers remarked, “look at me, I’m ashamed to admit that I’m 30 and my parents still live with me.”

Ba-dum-pa.

Actually, according to a recent survey by the financial concern TD Ameritrade it only takes until age 28 when a child finally becomes embarrassed that they’re still living at home.

I thought a lot about that this weekend when I sat through my second (and thankfully, last) graduation from college as my youngest received her diploma from Binghamton University – Magna Cum Laude – I may add (read: brag).

Just when the Mrs. and I were becoming used this empty nest thing.

Our eldest moved out last year – three years earlier than the Ameritrade tipping point for those keeping score at home and now we’ll see how long her sister decides to remain. By the amount of clothes and traditional hoarding of collegiate collectibles, I will give her at least a two-week grace/rest period to put everything in its proper place.

Then hopefully she’ll embark in earnest on that career thing.

By contrast when I left college, I had exactly one regulation Army footlocker that easily contained all my worldly possessions.

But I digress.

In between the requisite speeches by the chancellor, president and even guest speaker and BU alum Tony Kornheiser of ESPN’s “Pardon the Interruption” who received an honorary doctorate, I overheard a number of relatives and parents seated near me openly wondering what’s next?

Some graduates were fortunate to have a job waiting for them, while others no doubt had a series of interviews lined up.

And of course there’s the contagion of accumulating student loan debt to deal with, which is now approaching $1.5 trillion and growing at a rate of $2,700 per second – and no, that’s not a typo.

PER SECOND.

Four years ago I did urge to her to study accounting – being rather close to the profession and knowing firsthand about the labor shortage, I figured that would be one of the easier exercises in a job search.

But like most of my recommendations, she followed her older sister’s lead and promptly ignored me.

Hopefully by the end of the summer, she’ll land a position that is both enjoyable and challenging. And in the interim she’ll be living rent-free so ideally, she’ll be able to put some money away.

But like Elgar’s classic graduation composition, I told her in all paternal seriousness, that while she can be proud of her accomplishments, circumstances will inevitably follow the pomp.